The Nobel Peace Prize 2007

Has been awarded to the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) and Albert Arnold (Al) Gore Jr,

for their efforts to build up and disseminate greater knowledge about man-made climate change, and to lay the foundations for the measures that are needed to counteract such change.

Update: Chad at uncertain principles goes the Onion way with the Al Gore news!

“The President feels that at this time, it’s too early to say for sure whether Al Gore has won the Peace prize,” said White House spokesman Scott Stencil. “The science is just not conclusive yet. The President feels that more study is needed before we agree that this honor has been conferred to the former Vice President.”

When reporters pointed out that the announcement had been posted on the official Nobel Prize web site, Stencil raised the possibility of malicious computer hackers. “We have solid intelligence that indicates that pedophile computer hackers affiliated with Al Qaeda were planning to attack the Nobel Prize site. We think this ‘announcement’ might be the work of Islamofascist tree-huggers, and encourage all American citizens to run back to bed and cower under the covers until we determine the truth.” Stencil refused to identify the source of this intelligence, citing national security concerns.

The White House plans to call an international summit in early 2008, involving representatives of major oil-producing countries, to determine the real winner of the Nobel Prize. “We should be able to establish a clear consensus on the true winner of the 2007 Nobel Peace Prize by no later than October of 2015,” Stencil said. “We ask that people be patient.”

The announcement was the latest in a series of decisions that critics say indicate that the President is becoming increasingly disconnected from reality. These include his refusal to acknowledge the retirement of former British Prime Minister Tony Blair, an insistence that Will and Rebecca are still contestants on ‘Beauty and the Geek,’ and pretty much the entire Iraq war.

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